LAKE BUENA VISTA - There was a little buzz created recently when a local Tampa Bay paper suggested that as his contract demands drop because of the lack of interest, Barry Bonds could somehow land in St. Petersburg.

While thoughts of Bonds chasing down Henry Aaron for the all-time home run mark dances in the heads of Rays' fans, the move seems illogical for any number of reasons.

Make one up. They're all good.

Surely Bonds would not come down to a salary level so low that it would fit into Tampa Bay's barely noticeable bottom line and even if Florida was to freeze over and it happened, the "individual" would not fit into the team concept that manager Joe Maddon is trying to create.

While there is no "I" in team, there is in individual and that's what is wrong here.

The second best long ball hitter in all of the baseball world would turn Tropicana Field into a circus, not that some haven't already compared its roof configuration and bland gray concrete walls to one of those traveling pitch-a-tent, perform, pull it down tent appearance anyway.

It would make the Wade Boggs 3,000 hit chase look like an every day occurrence.

Each day he could sit in the corner of the dugout and hold his one-on-everybody press conference where he would take up a half hour or so and say nothing. He would be the side show to the other 24-players and bring bad karma to a clubhouse that has finally started to come together as a team.

If this were still the Vince "I'll do anything for a buck" Naimoli regime you can bet he would be flying out to the other left coast with hat in hand begging the slugger to come to the city he almost played in had the Giants actually moved here.

That would be his pitch. If there was a way for him to come out ahead in the wallet, it would be Hit Show Redux.

I can see the billboards now, Bonds, Cantu, Gomes, Iwamura, yada yada. Get your red hots, tickets that is. The Greatest Show on Earth has come to downtown St. Pete. Ringling Brothers down in Sarasota would have nothing on us, they're just pretend, Vince would say.

Excuse me. I just had another flashback to the Canseco, Vaughn and Castilla days. Where's my Prozac?

Just when did we stop paying for that anyway?

Even if Barry were in his prime, he comes with so much baggage the concierge at the Vinoy would not have enough bellhops.

And now?

There could come a day when the local constabulary shows up at the Trop and cart Bond's rather large carcass off the field right in the middle of a game because a warrant has been issued for his arrest in the Balco case, tax evasion or simply jaywalking in Frisco. It could happen!

Whatever.

I know the Rays were the first major league team to have a player suspended for using performance enhancing drugs but why would the current ownership even consider bringing the guy with a head the size of his ego here with that cloud of suspicion hanging over him?

For cripes sakes, we finally got rid of the Ziggy cloud hanging over the ballpark when Vinny disappeared, we don't need another surly, miserable human being in Tampa Bay. There's only room for one and Naimoli has already claimed the title.

It would have been fun to see what would have happened if Hugh Culverhouse was still alive.

Besides, San Francisco, the team, area and its fans, who by the way sell more blinders than a horse racing convention, want him back. Hard to understand why but love makes people do strange things.

Steroids? Surely not Barry.

And while we're at it, shouldn't general manager be tested for drugs?

When Giants' GM Brian Sabean asked if it made "baseball sense" to bring Bonds back he replied, "Yes."

Better him than us. You can count on it.